I miss blogging a lot. Haha. I know I often write this on my blog. But I can't help it. I always forget to update this published-personal page, and when I do, there's always a large time gap between each post :)
I feel like my life is a journey that always has different challenge each year.
This year, I started my challenge with a vow.
A marriage vow. It was in February.
Being someone's wife is not that scary. Yes, it's different with being single. Yet, it's very fulfilling and blissful.
The challenge is, we had a long distance relationship. Then, we decided to meet every 2 weeks. It felt very long, yet at the same time it's very exhausting. I had to go to Jakarta every month, and he had to go to Malang too every month. It's still exhausting even when he went to my place. Well, maybe because I had a lot of homework from my college. I felt I was lack of sleep and lack of "me-time". I even seldom go to my parents' house in Sidoarjo after marriage.
But I love him. And that's my source of strength.
The next challenge started after I finished the first semester of the year in college.
I got pregnant.
This. Is. Big.
Being a wife, especially a long-distanced one, is not very difficult. But being a mother? I felt dizzy and panic at first. Well, when I got married, I know it is possible to get pregnant and then be a mother. Yet, a dozen of negative test packs successfully took down my alarm. I was getting used to it. And after several months, I never expected it's going to show a positive result.
Especially, when my husband was going to go abroad.
I was scared, but actually happy at the same time. I just felt that I was still not good enough, not knowledgeable enough, to be a mother. And I was scared to imagine how I would carry this baby bump when my husband was not going to be around me.
It made me stressed and I got bleeding several times. I know it wasn't good for my baby, so I try to get rid of those negative thinking. My husband and his family supported me. My family supported me too, even mom came to Malang to help me.
Now, it's been 5 months. I live a good life here, with my mom staying with me in Malang, and my husband living far away in UK. It's not that scary anymore. I even enjoy it a lot. (Maybe because the morning sickness period has gone? Or maybe because I get to eat my mom's food everyday? Kekeke)
Even though my husband lives far away, I'm not worried. We realize that now each of us are in a studying duty, to gain the knowledge we hope will bring goodness to our mankind. We love and trust each other, and we hope Allah will count this as our way to worship Him, and may Allah always bless us.
I grow to love my baby-to-be more and more each day. This feeling is amazing. Bismillah, I hope everything is going to be well, and my baby can grow healthy and happy.
This semester is my last semester to attend the classes. Next year, I'm going to solely have my undergraduate thesis, for which I can stay at home while taking care of my baby. Insha Allah :)
Hopefully, my husband can make it to go here when I give birth to our first child next year. :*
I feel like my life is a journey that always has different challenge each year.
This year, I started my challenge with a vow.
Being someone's wife is not that scary. Yes, it's different with being single. Yet, it's very fulfilling and blissful.
The challenge is, we had a long distance relationship. Then, we decided to meet every 2 weeks. It felt very long, yet at the same time it's very exhausting. I had to go to Jakarta every month, and he had to go to Malang too every month. It's still exhausting even when he went to my place. Well, maybe because I had a lot of homework from my college. I felt I was lack of sleep and lack of "me-time". I even seldom go to my parents' house in Sidoarjo after marriage.
But I love him. And that's my source of strength.
The next challenge started after I finished the first semester of the year in college.
I got pregnant.
This. Is. Big.
Being a wife, especially a long-distanced one, is not very difficult. But being a mother? I felt dizzy and panic at first. Well, when I got married, I know it is possible to get pregnant and then be a mother. Yet, a dozen of negative test packs successfully took down my alarm. I was getting used to it. And after several months, I never expected it's going to show a positive result.
Especially, when my husband was going to go abroad.
I was scared, but actually happy at the same time. I just felt that I was still not good enough, not knowledgeable enough, to be a mother. And I was scared to imagine how I would carry this baby bump when my husband was not going to be around me.
It made me stressed and I got bleeding several times. I know it wasn't good for my baby, so I try to get rid of those negative thinking. My husband and his family supported me. My family supported me too, even mom came to Malang to help me.
Now, it's been 5 months. I live a good life here, with my mom staying with me in Malang, and my husband living far away in UK. It's not that scary anymore. I even enjoy it a lot. (Maybe because the morning sickness period has gone? Or maybe because I get to eat my mom's food everyday? Kekeke)
Even though my husband lives far away, I'm not worried. We realize that now each of us are in a studying duty, to gain the knowledge we hope will bring goodness to our mankind. We love and trust each other, and we hope Allah will count this as our way to worship Him, and may Allah always bless us.
I grow to love my baby-to-be more and more each day. This feeling is amazing. Bismillah, I hope everything is going to be well, and my baby can grow healthy and happy.
This semester is my last semester to attend the classes. Next year, I'm going to solely have my undergraduate thesis, for which I can stay at home while taking care of my baby. Insha Allah :)
Hopefully, my husband can make it to go here when I give birth to our first child next year. :*
2 comments:
namanya siapa sa suamimu? Sama" sekantor nih kayaknya di BPK Jakarta. Wkwkwk
Rezza Rinova. Hahaha iya di BPK pusat mas.
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